On why we need feminism and why thinking you want equality isn’t enough

Disclaimers:

  • I’m not schooled in the facts, history, art or anything of feminism, I’m just seeing things that are fucked up in the world.
  • I’m generally disappointed in the way I wrote this blogpost, but still wanted to post it anyway
  • Sorry in advance if you’re equally disappointed.
  • Obvious misogynist behaviour talk is left out in this post because… those things are obvious, everyone on the Internet can enjoy that shit every day.

Despite what you might have perceived from the world of feminism and whatever you might think of equality, there’s a big chance you probably don’t know you yourself are contributing to the patriarchy. Within this space both men and women are maintaining current society’s separation and misconception of what they think of what a woman is and what a man is, which feeds into the unequal treatment of all sexes and all genders. The problem feminism is trying to solve, is not just the end goal of equal treatment of all sexes and genders, but making people aware that the root of the problem lies in the un-equality that our society has normalised so much that we’re not aware we’re participating in it every day.

I’m not here to blame anyone, nobody is perfect; not me, not you, not anyone. We all grew up learning how the world works and it’s ingrained in everything that we do now, whether we want it or not. It’s just that how the world currently works, is wrong. From the moment you were born and your parents learned your sex, you were treated and thought of un-equally through gender roles. Even when your parents would be like “oh I don’t care as long as he or she is healthy”, they applied gender roles as soon as you were born. Even if your parents do their best into treating and or teaching you to not apply them, your peers and teachers at school will soon undo the work and squeeze gender roles into your brain.

When you say you just want to treat people equally, you’re undermining the problems we face to be able to actually treat people equally. You’re not realising that you yourself have a picture or a list in your head of what woman and a man are, but aren’t aware that the majority of these points on these lists can actually be true for all genders. You’re not realising that you’re making excuses in the positive or negative based on sex differences while they should be applied to all sexes.

Even when you know what the concept of gender roles mean, you might not still be actually aware that not just you, but everyone, applies them in their daily lives in a subconscious or conscious manner. Almost every company you see uses gender by default to make separation of products and services they sell, more than not done by applying gender roles. Expectations of anyone that is surrounded by these large amounts of unnecessarily gendered products feed into the endless cycle whether you want it or not. Almost everyone subconsciously applies gender roles when having some kind of opinion about what someone is saying, showing or wearing, which feeds into the normalisation of gender roles.

When talking about feminism and “fighting the patriarchy” we’re not talking about fighting men, we’re talking about fighting society’s normalisation of privileging men and equalising the playing field for all genders.

Equality for women is such a big thing in this equation because they are most apparently affected, and you can actually make legislation around the specific issues that women face in the world. But even when everything possible has been done to deal with these issues, the underlying problems will most likely remain until society is actually aware of how unequal and gender-role influenced their behaviour is.

Disregard what you think you know is true and look around you, and you’ll understand that just saying you want equal rights, probably won’t be enough.

Optional bonus rants if you want to read more.

Gendered products rant

First of all, gender is a social construct, so nothing should be gendered either way unless extensive research has somehow shown that certain genders genuinely hate your products and others don’t. And even when this is the case, you should probably opt to still not label the product with a gender, but actually identify the cause for why they hated your product and categorise the products into non-gendered differences.

Gender and even sometimes sex has nothing to do with what kind of body shape you have and what kind of products you can use for your body, except when it comes to things that depend on size, shape and maladies of actual reproductive organs and boobs. But even these examples shouldn’t be categorised by sex or gender, but by actually saying what they do to said body part.

Equal pay rant

When the issue of “equal pay” for women comes into a discussion, the problem isn’t just that women get paid less for equal work, but because the excuses that were formed around women were not equally applied to men. Pregnancy is always a big topic of discussion of these excuses, but people always fail to realise all sexes and genders should have equal opportunity to be part of everything that surrounds planning, expecting and raising a child. Or maybe you think a man should have enough money to provide for their family and bare the costs of living, without realising that all genders may face the same problems and costs. Maybe you think women cause all kinds of gossip and drama instead of working, without realising that actually all genders do that depending on who they are and what kind of people they work with. Maybe for physical labour you think females aren’t physically capable of doing the same, without realising that you’re assuming males will always be able to meet your undocumented standards. Maybe you’re like ‘what about hormones’, everyone produces or receives all types of hormones in different and constantly variant quantities, there is no way you can actually quantify and name differences it makes generalised by gender (nor sex).

There are genuine differences between sexes, and there are general differences between genders, but there’s no need to sustain a patriarchy for any reason.

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2 thoughts on “On why we need feminism and why thinking you want equality isn’t enough

  1. This reminds me of a collection of short stories called The Bloody Chamber by Angela Carter. She uses classic fairytales with gender role twists to make the reader stop and think, first because we’re so used to those stories being told a certain way and we’re surprised by the behaviour of the female characters, and then because we realize that thinking epitomizes our conditioning by the patriarchy. I recommend it if you’re into that kind of thing 🙂

    https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/49011.The_Bloody_Chamber_and_Other_Stories

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